Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Kidnapped! Or, How This Diary Began

Really, it was most disconcerting. One moment, I was lying in my beloved's arms on the terrace, the purple and green wisteria rioting overhead. Strangely, we were in ball dress in full daylight, but I'm perfectly sure there was an explanation for that.

The next moment, I found myself in a sort of cave, surrounded by a band of what looked for all the world like female brigands! They snatched the pearls from around my throat, muttering something about 'Bandit Booty' and locked me in a room with a strangely spoken and rather scantily clad man called Sven. If I understand him correctly, he wishes me to lie down on a table and let him put his hands on my person! Only a massage, indeed! The last man who put his hands on me that way did not mean anything good by it!

But these strange drinks he keeps offering me do look rather festive, if a little vulgar. I wonder if I might just have a taste . . .

[If this Sven so much as breathed on you, my lady, he is a dead man.~Ed]

6 comments:

jo robertson said...

Hmmm, and did these strange female brigands also look at your backside while muttering "booty"?

Anna Campbell said...

Jo, I can speak as one of the brigands and say with complete honesty that the only backside I was looking at was Sven's! Hubba hubba in a Swedish accent!

Helen said...

I am really enjoying this

Have Fun
Helen

Tawny said...

Did these strange female brigands have killer boots, too? Methinks they did.

altho I deny any backside booty looking!

Lady Kate said...

Gracious! Who are all these people? And how did they start talking on my lapdog?

They must have gained access to the machine while I slept!

They seem to be talking to me, don't they? They are very bold to address me without a proper introduction. But they sound like they might be amusing to know.

I shall find Mrs. Wells and ask her to do the honours...

Caren Crane said...

Lady Kate, do not fear the Banditas! We--I mean, they--mean you no harm. Sven is a hired man. He performs the services of a ladies maid only he's...er...male. Well, it's a bit complicated. Just trust us: he's really good!